When University of Wyoming President Phil Dubois was first invited to speak at UC Davis about the beating death of gay student Matthew Shepard, he nearly said no. Dubois, a former UC Davis professor and administrator as well as alumnus, said Shepard's murder was one of the most painful experiences of his life--both professionally and personally. "Other than the death of my parents, I cannot recall anything that made me as sad as this for such a long period of time," he said. "I wasn't really anxious to relive it." However, Dubois said that after more thought--and encouragement from UC Davis Vice Chancellor for Student Affairs Carol Wall and others--he reconsidered. "When you're a university president you don't have a lot of time for reflection," he said. "I thought this might be good therapy to go back and think about what happened and see if I couldn't share with you some of the lessons of this tragic event." Chief among those lessons is the importance of confronting bigotry and hatred, Dubois said in a talk last Friday that kicked off a three-day annual conference of the UC-wide Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Association. "Each of us has a role to play," he said. "We can teach our kids that people who are different, are simply that--different....There should be no pleasure in inflicting pain or ridicule on others. "For ourselves, whatever the answer turns out to be, at least a part of it includes a willingness to speak out." More than 500 people attended the Gayz into the Millennium conference, which also featured speeches by Candance Gingrich, the half-sister of former House Speaker Newt Gingrich, and other prominent gay-rights activists. Dubois' speech, in addition to launching the gay-lesbian conference, also was the first in a "Series for Cultural Competence" lectures for UC Davis staff members organized by the Cross-Cultural Center and sponsored by the Office of Student Affairs. Dubois--who became University of Wyoming president in April 1997 after serving in administrative and faculty posts at the University of North Carolina and UC Davis--found himself thrust into the national limelight in October 1998 when Shepard was mortally beaten. Two young men, both high-school drop-outs, had lured Shepard from a bar, drove him to the outskirts of Laramie, tied him to a fence, savagely pistol-whipped him and left him to die. In the weeks and months that followed, Dubois played a prominent leadership role--assembling a crisis team, conducting interviews with national and international media, contending with virulent anti-gay protesters and organizing community memorials--including a concert by folk singers Peter, Paul and Mary on the anniversary of Shepard's death. Dubois said the idea of holding a week of teach-ins after Shepard's funeral came from his experiences at UC Davis--from teach-ins both while he was an undergraduate student during the Vietnam War and an administrator during the Gulf War. Eventually, he would call for Wyoming lawmakers to pass a law against hate crimes--a position that drew him criticism. During his talk here to about 150 people, Dubois showed samples of television news coverage and video clips of community events, including a benefit concert given at the University of Wyoming by pop star Elton John. Dubois' presentation moved many in the audience to both laughter and tears. Dubois said members of the media and the public were quick to stereotype Wyoming, looking for a simple answer to explain a senseless death. He received several hateful e-mail messages, the worst one accusing him and others in Wyoming of teaching hatred of homosexuals and saying Shepard's blood was on their hands. "The pop singer Madonna called my office," Dubois said. "She ragged on my secretary for 40 minutes about what a horrible place Wyoming must be, what a terrible place the university must be and what an absolutely abominable leader I was. And I liked Madonna before that." Dubois said residents of Laramie saw Shepard's murder as a community issue, rather than a gay issue. However, he said the community erred by becoming defensive. "We fell into the trap of saying, 'This can't happen here.' ... That was a mistake, because it can happen here. It can happen anywhere." The University of Wyoming also reviewed and rewrote its policies to ensure they reflected an existing campus prohibition against discrimination based on sexual preference. Dubois said he has become more aware of his own attitudes and language. His oldest son used to use the phrase "That's so gay" to dismiss something he thought wasn't cool. "We don't say that in our house anymore."